First impressions: 5 tricks of reading body language to determine if you like someone or not in seconds!

I boast to people about how quickly I know upon meeting someone if I like them or not.  The first impression is the best impression you have on someone.  After that, you will spend a lot of time getting to know them, only to realize what you knew all along was true about them.

How do you do this?

  1. Trust your instincts!
    • This is a no-brainer. You must be aware of how your body reacts to meeting someone.  Do you feel edgy or warm?  Are you immediately attracted to their personality. Does this gaze seem genuine?  Does the hair on the back of your neck stand up like a giant “Watch out for this person” statement? You can determine all this in seconds.
  2. Look at their eyes
    • Making eye contact is the best way to peer into someone’s soul without really trying.  If they hold their gaze, it means they are interested in making a connection.  Averting eyes could be a cultural habit, or it could mean the person is flakey or insecure.  But if that person makes and maintains eye contact, chances are pretty good that they are in control and confident where they stand.
  3. Do they speak quickly or slowly?
    • Being a very astute observer of human behaviour, I’ve come to learn that slow speakers can be the most thoughtful, calculated people out there.  Don’t judge a book by its cover.  Quick speakers also have sharp minds but sometimes come off as being boisterous whether they intend to or not.  I have a mix of folks in my close circle.  You really need to look at the whole package.
  4. Is the person an active listener or just talking for the sake of it?
    • One of my biggest pet peeves about people is when they start talking about themselves more than asking questions about me when they first meet me.  I find this comes off very arrogant, especially to introverted people.  Talking for the sake of filling dead air can come very naturally to people who are uncomfortable with silence.  I find those people to be more anxious and stressed than people who just speak slowly or say very few words at all.
    • Another offshoot of this is, does that person keep their word or do they come up with a lot of excuses to back out of things on a frequent basis?
  5. Is their handshake firm or limp and clammy?
    • Firm handshakes are generally a good sign of confidence in a person.  I find that quality very endearing because I like people who are decisive and in control.  A vice grip comes off hostile.  A limp and clammy handshake, which I call a dead fish handshake, is the opposite where I don’t believe the person to be in control or be very superficial.

None of my above observations are based on any sort of psychology degree, just what I’ve gathered over the years.  It’s very easy for me to figure out where I stand on people within the first minute or two of meeting them.  I’ve never really been proven wrong about a person yet.  When I doubt what I sense is when I’ll end up getting disappointed. Trust your instincts!

Do you have any tricks that you keep in mind when you are meeting someone for the first time?  What traits are important for you to find?

Thanks for reading!


The “pitfalls” of abundance

The “pitfalls” of abundance

I’ve spoken before on the concept of being specific when you are talking about abundance affirmations and meditations.  It’s kind of a big deal and anyone working with the Law of Attraction shouldn’t take this lightly.

If you ask the Universe for let’s say “connecting with friends” the Universe won’t be able to tell which friends you are requesting.  It will just somehow get the attention of everyone in your friend circle that may be open to receiving the call.  This includes acquaintances and perhaps people who may have lost touch with due to a disagreement.

But is that really what you were going for?  Maybe we need to work on our wording and phrasing so the Universe brings us exactly what we desire.  However, first we must figure out what we want.

It’s always a good idea to do some introspective work.  Ask yourself questions regarding the specifics of your goal.  For instance, going back to the reconnecting with friends bit, maybe you want to have a timeline e.g.) within the next month.  Maybe you want to reconnect with certain friends e.g.) give the Universe some names.  Don’t leave this to assuming the Universe will just figure it out.  That’s not really the right attitude.

I also find that if my request is too broad, then the outcome I am looking for never comes to fruition.  But when I specify what I want in even a few details, I will inevitably receive it.

When I was in my early 20’s dabbling with some Wiccan spell rituals, I decided to cast a love spell under a full moon on Halloween night.  It was perfect timing to accomplish anything.  The veil is known to be the thinnest at that time, so I was ready to work!

I spent a couple days gathering all the ingredients I needed for my spell to work.  This included the right herbs, the right tools like candles, a wand, a knife, offerings, a tablecloth, the correct crystals to enhance the energy, writing the incantation and then figuring out the order of how to do things.  This was before the days of YouTube so I read a lot of books on the subject but didn’t really have a mentor.

My altar was set, I invoked the cardinal directions, cast my circle with a blade, read aloud my spell and set my intention to attract the perfect boyfriend.  I gave a few specifics (I wanted someone tall, kind, loving to animals, and financially stable).  I thanked the spirits, gods and goddesses, closed the circle and grounded myself.

It was pretty powerful stuff I was dabbling with!  In fact, I refuse to even do this kind of work anymore unless it’s something serious that I feel I need assistance with.  I didn’t even know how this all worked or if I would even end up achieving anything.  At that time, I’d been single for a long time and I just wanted to find someone.  The risk was that it could have backfired as well with the Law of Three (any energy good or bad that you send out into the Universe comes back to you threefold).

I did end up meeting a man with all these qualities.  However, we had a hard time communicating. He was not as book smart as I would have liked.  I found out that he was cheating on me. There were things lacking in the relationship that were huge red flags.

From that experience I learned a lot.  Still, I reflect back to what happened and find new things I didn’t know before.  Most importantly, I learned that being as specific as I was, the Universe gave me exactly what I asked for.

Abundance manifestation is not easy and there’s no formula to it.  You must work at it and find your own way.  Our thoughts and intentions are very powerful.  I caution you though: use this at your own risk.  However, be prepared to reap the rewards if you work hard and learn to do it right.

Have you done any abundance or manifestation work that didn’t go as planned?  Tell me what happened if you are open to sharing!

Thanks for reading!



Stop talking yourself out of your life purpose!

Stop talking yourself out of your life purpose!

It can take a while before you figure out what the Universe has in store for you. People see me all the time to find out their life purpose. It seems so obvious to me what a complete stranger’s purpose is but why doesn’t he or she know it for themselves? Actually, they do.

Why does it take someone you don’t know to tell you what your heart desires before you believe it? The answer is pretty straightforward, and it sucks, frankly.

Doubts and fears debilitate us. They prevent us from moving forward into the unknown. We have a tendency to look back to where we came from because it’s comfortable. But as we all know, change happens outside of our comfort zones! Just because we know a universal truth in our minds does not mean we have any sort of faith in it.

Sometimes a trusted friend can cut through the bullshit and tell us the truth. Or, the same friend may hold back the truth to protect us from getting hurt.  The dichotomy is infuriating!

I’m a big believer of unfettered honesty. Wouldn’t you rather know the truth than blindly chase something that isn’t real? My time and efforts are valuable to me.  So please save me the trouble of wasting my time on something that isn’t worth it when you see it.  I may not want to hear it in that moment, but after I calm down I’ll probably appreciate it.

For instance, you know that a job isn’t right for you. It’s not fun. You hate your boss and coworkers. Waking up to get ready for work fills you with dread. You clock-watch the entire day waiting for the misery to end.

So why don’t you quit? Looking for new work is hard. The learning curve sucks at a new job. You will deal with the same politics when you move on. Now, this concept is not limited to your job or career.  The same can be applied to relationships, poor eating habits, starting an exercise program, education, etc.  So why don’t you quit doing what’s wrong for you, and do what’s right?

You convince yourself you won’t make money at it. Entrepreneurs are notorious for failing at businesses. The good ones eventually succeed but it takes a lot of time to get there. Time and money that you may not have.  Moving on from a crappy relationship is hard because your finances might be tied up, or you have kids, or a million other reasons why you can’t leave.

But what if you absolutely crush it when you move forward? What if you are unstoppably successful? 

Are we so scared to succeed we talk ourselves out of trying in the first place?  Life is hard. Without risk, there is no reward. We are making life way harder than it needs to be.

How do we get out of the cycle of repeated torture? We need to reprogram our brains to stop the negative self talk. Fill up our minds with thoughts of success rather than failure. Rip out the criticism and replace it with praise for all the things we love to do and are good at! We need to be our own cheerleaders. Don’t look to other people to give you approval, give it to yourself.

Can we escape from the prison of our minds? Yes we can! I’ve seen so many people chasing their dreams and making them a reality. I want that for myself. Every little step I take in the direction of my dream is one more step closer to achieving it. It’s not easy, cheap, or quick. But it’s something. Real.

When I started Sacred Ash Divination back in April 2013, I was scared to death.  What if people didn’t support me?  What if I lost my friends who didn’t believe in new age-y spirituality?  What if no one thought I was good at mediumship or psychic readings?  I hustled hard and got my website up, got my Paypal account hooked up for online payments, and I started up my Facebook and Twitter accounts for my business to get the word out.

I made the most money I ever made in that first year at this business because I had everything on the line.  I had been laid off from work and was unemployed for 4 months.  However, I put my full-time efforts into my business and it blossomed!  But, I panicked that I wasn’t making as much money as I had in my corporate career and I convinced myself to go back.  Soon after that fear set in, my efforts on my business dwindled and so did the success.  I didn’t lose any friends, in fact many of them paid for readings and supported my venture!  But what I came to realize is that I took one step forward and two steps back.  Fear is the killer of dreams.

I hope you’ll start believing in your destiny if you haven’t done so already. Where might you end up if you stopped talking yourself out of your life purpose?


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The one time an aura scared the crap out of me

The one time an aura scared the crap out of me

Those of us who are blessed with the gift of clairvoyance have the ability to see things outside of the physical realm that others do not see.  One of those things include auras.

Auras are the energy a person or living creature gives off.  They surround the entire body, existing in the front and back, below and above a person.  This energy can be either colourless or give off multiple colours as the mood of the person shifts.

You can detect auras visually but they can also be felt physically if you are attuned to them.  In religious paintings, auras are depicted as halos around the heads of important figures.

In September 2015, I was attending the Afterlife Conference in Phoenix when I was watching a few speakers on stage.  I was attending the conference with some medium friends who I had somehow convinced to come with me to this thing that I thought would be super cool and give us some insights about death and the afterlife from a non-Arthur Findlay perspective.

Arthur Findlay College in the UK is the premiere institution of mediumship renowned for its educational curriculum and haunted halls.  I have attended workshops in Calgary given by revered tutors from AFC over the years.  I find myself disagreeing many times with AFC’s teachings, and that’s ok.  I do not deny that they do good work for the world by spreading mediumship to more people.

Getting back to the conference, I was listening to a lecture by a paranormal expert Rosemary Ellen Guilley. She was speaking about the Djinn who are supernatural creatures sourced from Islamic mythology. They can be good or evil and come in many forms to interact with humans.  As she was talking about them, I forced myself to watch her aura.  In previous lectures, I hadn’t been paying attention to auras of the guest speakers but my medium friends were.  WTF? I wasn’t about to be one-upped by them!  I have the sight too, dammit!  Anyway, as I watched and listened to this very interesting talk on the Djinn, I saw Guilley’s aura clear as day.  It was unmistakably grey, tall, two or three times her size and spiky like she was standing in front of the Iron Throne (from Game of Thrones).  I was stunned.  After the lecture, I asked all my friends what they saw.  Comments like “Her aura was big” were uttered.  No, but did you see anything else like spikes?  “What do you mean?”  Shit, did I just make this up?

I couldn’t sleep that night.  Not only had the topic of the Djinn scared the crap out of me, I hadn’t seen an aura like that before and I was doubting my ability as a clairvoyant.  Talk about self-criticism!

The next day, I went to the table where Guilley was signing her books and I really wanted to get her signature.  Mustering up the courage as I spoke to her about how amazing (and chilling) her topic was, I finally asked “Your aura looked strange.  I thought I saw these really huge spikes in there.  Can you tell me what that was about?”  She responded flatly, “Of course you saw the spikes.  I put them there because of the work I do.” Guilley deals a lot of with negative energies like malevolent entities and possessions so this is how she shields herself.  Brilliant!  I spoke with her about my own experiences with entities and we had a very cool conversation.

I was so relieved and so impressed with myself after Guilley confirmed what I saw was real! No one else saw her aura the way I did.  Man, I kick ass!  And man does that shit freak me out.  Hahaha!

She signed my book after I told her about the aura I saw!  I still get goosebumps when I read that inscription.


OMG, I’m blogging! WTF

As a spiritual being who meditates a little less than I should, I just wanted to extend my whole-hearted welcome to you.

I am a happily married 30-something from Calgary, AB CANADA.  I grew up in in this city and I love my hometown very much.  My day job involves life in corporate Calgary and also have a business on the side that speaks more to my passion.  Like Teresa Caputo, I am a psychic medium.  I lack the hair, the nails, makeup and the tv show.  However, I can and do regularly talk to spirit.  They’ve got my back and they’ve got yours too, if you believe in that sort of woo-woo.  Doreen Virtue, angel cards, crystal balls and smudging sticks are displayed prominently on a shelf in my living room/dining room. My loving husband is very supportive of my spiritual endeavours among my earthly adventures.

I’m just going to put it out there that there will be a ton of woo and authenticity on this blog. I will speak to higher level subjects like angels, fairies, rainbows and unicorns (only one of which is real…unicorns, obvs!)  But I will also talk about my thoughts on love, relationships, loved ones in spirit, meditation, divine purpose, and so on.

If you like what you’re seeing so far, please follow this blog and let me know what you think.  Does my writing speak to you?  Can you relate to my eccentricities?  It’s too early for comments, isn’t it?