Stop talking yourself out of your life purpose!

Stop talking yourself out of your life purpose!

It can take a while before you figure out what the Universe has in store for you. People see me all the time to find out their life purpose. It seems so obvious to me what a complete stranger’s purpose is but why doesn’t he or she know it for themselves? Actually, they do.

Why does it take someone you don’t know to tell you what your heart desires before you believe it? The answer is pretty straightforward, and it sucks, frankly.

Doubts and fears debilitate us. They prevent us from moving forward into the unknown. We have a tendency to look back to where we came from because it’s comfortable. But as we all know, change happens outside of our comfort zones! Just because we know a universal truth in our minds does not mean we have any sort of faith in it.

Sometimes a trusted friend can cut through the bullshit and tell us the truth. Or, the same friend may hold back the truth to protect us from getting hurt.  The dichotomy is infuriating!

I’m a big believer of unfettered honesty. Wouldn’t you rather know the truth than blindly chase something that isn’t real? My time and efforts are valuable to me.  So please save me the trouble of wasting my time on something that isn’t worth it when you see it.  I may not want to hear it in that moment, but after I calm down I’ll probably appreciate it.

For instance, you know that a job isn’t right for you. It’s not fun. You hate your boss and coworkers. Waking up to get ready for work fills you with dread. You clock-watch the entire day waiting for the misery to end.

So why don’t you quit? Looking for new work is hard. The learning curve sucks at a new job. You will deal with the same politics when you move on. Now, this concept is not limited to your job or career.  The same can be applied to relationships, poor eating habits, starting an exercise program, education, etc.  So why don’t you quit doing what’s wrong for you, and do what’s right?

You convince yourself you won’t make money at it. Entrepreneurs are notorious for failing at businesses. The good ones eventually succeed but it takes a lot of time to get there. Time and money that you may not have.  Moving on from a crappy relationship is hard because your finances might be tied up, or you have kids, or a million other reasons why you can’t leave.

But what if you absolutely crush it when you move forward? What if you are unstoppably successful? 

Are we so scared to succeed we talk ourselves out of trying in the first place?  Life is hard. Without risk, there is no reward. We are making life way harder than it needs to be.

How do we get out of the cycle of repeated torture? We need to reprogram our brains to stop the negative self talk. Fill up our minds with thoughts of success rather than failure. Rip out the criticism and replace it with praise for all the things we love to do and are good at! We need to be our own cheerleaders. Don’t look to other people to give you approval, give it to yourself.

Can we escape from the prison of our minds? Yes we can! I’ve seen so many people chasing their dreams and making them a reality. I want that for myself. Every little step I take in the direction of my dream is one more step closer to achieving it. It’s not easy, cheap, or quick. But it’s something. Real.

When I started Sacred Ash Divination back in April 2013, I was scared to death.  What if people didn’t support me?  What if I lost my friends who didn’t believe in new age-y spirituality?  What if no one thought I was good at mediumship or psychic readings?  I hustled hard and got my website up, got my Paypal account hooked up for online payments, and I started up my Facebook and Twitter accounts for my business to get the word out.

I made the most money I ever made in that first year at this business because I had everything on the line.  I had been laid off from work and was unemployed for 4 months.  However, I put my full-time efforts into my business and it blossomed!  But, I panicked that I wasn’t making as much money as I had in my corporate career and I convinced myself to go back.  Soon after that fear set in, my efforts on my business dwindled and so did the success.  I didn’t lose any friends, in fact many of them paid for readings and supported my venture!  But what I came to realize is that I took one step forward and two steps back.  Fear is the killer of dreams.

I hope you’ll start believing in your destiny if you haven’t done so already. Where might you end up if you stopped talking yourself out of your life purpose?


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The one time an aura scared the crap out of me

The one time an aura scared the crap out of me

Those of us who are blessed with the gift of clairvoyance have the ability to see things outside of the physical realm that others do not see.  One of those things include auras.

Auras are the energy a person or living creature gives off.  They surround the entire body, existing in the front and back, below and above a person.  This energy can be either colourless or give off multiple colours as the mood of the person shifts.

You can detect auras visually but they can also be felt physically if you are attuned to them.  In religious paintings, auras are depicted as halos around the heads of important figures.

In September 2015, I was attending the Afterlife Conference in Phoenix when I was watching a few speakers on stage.  I was attending the conference with some medium friends who I had somehow convinced to come with me to this thing that I thought would be super cool and give us some insights about death and the afterlife from a non-Arthur Findlay perspective.

Arthur Findlay College in the UK is the premiere institution of mediumship renowned for its educational curriculum and haunted halls.  I have attended workshops in Calgary given by revered tutors from AFC over the years.  I find myself disagreeing many times with AFC’s teachings, and that’s ok.  I do not deny that they do good work for the world by spreading mediumship to more people.

Getting back to the conference, I was listening to a lecture by a paranormal expert Rosemary Ellen Guilley. She was speaking about the Djinn who are supernatural creatures sourced from Islamic mythology. They can be good or evil and come in many forms to interact with humans.  As she was talking about them, I forced myself to watch her aura.  In previous lectures, I hadn’t been paying attention to auras of the guest speakers but my medium friends were.  WTF? I wasn’t about to be one-upped by them!  I have the sight too, dammit!  Anyway, as I watched and listened to this very interesting talk on the Djinn, I saw Guilley’s aura clear as day.  It was unmistakably grey, tall, two or three times her size and spiky like she was standing in front of the Iron Throne (from Game of Thrones).  I was stunned.  After the lecture, I asked all my friends what they saw.  Comments like “Her aura was big” were uttered.  No, but did you see anything else like spikes?  “What do you mean?”  Shit, did I just make this up?

I couldn’t sleep that night.  Not only had the topic of the Djinn scared the crap out of me, I hadn’t seen an aura like that before and I was doubting my ability as a clairvoyant.  Talk about self-criticism!

The next day, I went to the table where Guilley was signing her books and I really wanted to get her signature.  Mustering up the courage as I spoke to her about how amazing (and chilling) her topic was, I finally asked “Your aura looked strange.  I thought I saw these really huge spikes in there.  Can you tell me what that was about?”  She responded flatly, “Of course you saw the spikes.  I put them there because of the work I do.” Guilley deals a lot of with negative energies like malevolent entities and possessions so this is how she shields herself.  Brilliant!  I spoke with her about my own experiences with entities and we had a very cool conversation.

I was so relieved and so impressed with myself after Guilley confirmed what I saw was real! No one else saw her aura the way I did.  Man, I kick ass!  And man does that shit freak me out.  Hahaha!

She signed my book after I told her about the aura I saw!  I still get goosebumps when I read that inscription.


Meeting my spirit guide…or how I suck at clairaudience

Meeting my spirit guide…or how I suck at clairaudience

One of the first things you learn when you are developing your mediumship and psychic abilities is how to meet your spirit guide.  You are usually led through a relaxing, guided meditation in a darkened room where you are asked to calm your mind so that spirit has an easier time communicating with you.  As long as you can easily go into a meditative or trance-like state, the quicker it’ll be to sense the presence of spirit.

The first time I spoke to my deceased paternal grandfather I was 12.  I was dabbling in Ouija boards as a curious child.  I always had an affinity towards the occult.

Ok, let me just state for the record how stupid it is for a child to come near a Ouija board.  Have you seen the horror movies about spirit possession and demons somehow getting through the board?  While all this might sound like superstitious gobbledy-gook, I will assert Ouija boards are not child’s play nor are they for adults either. You may or may not believe in any of this stuff.  Please exercise caution and good judgement before messing with things you may not understand.

Returning to my story, I spoke to my paternal grandfather through the Ouija board.  In short time, I realized that I didn’t even need the board to talk to him.  I could do it anytime.  We’d have conversations.  Soon, an uncle passed away and I started chatting with my uncle.  It was a lovely reunion and since both these people lived in India and my family lived in Canada, I didn’t know them in life.  The connection was crisp after they passed on though!  Unfortunately, I never really thought to speak to anyone else’s loved ones in spirit; I kept my gifts to myself until my early-30’s.

I had been going to psychic fairs and attended the Calgary First Spiritualist Church services in the 2000’s and was feeling a great pull towards developing my mediumship.  I knew nothing about mediumship really, I just figured I should try it and see if I could open up my gifts more.  In 2012, I began my journey and never looked back.

So, getting back to meeting my spirit guide, I did meet her in one of these meditations.  I was a cocky first-timer because I was kicking ass at this meditation thing and this woman just popped up in my head and told me she was my spirit guide.  A beautiful young woman, I assumed she died in her 30’s and came to me to offer her support and guidance. Her energy was pure love and understanding.  She knew everything about me.  “What is your name?” I asked.  She responded, “Fiona.”  I proceeded to call her Fiona for many months.

In another meditation, Fiona changed form.  She became more like a fairy princess.  This time I heard the name “Inonna”.  Oh, that sounds a lot like Fiona.  I just misheard it.  Her energy was extremely powerful, goddess-like even.  As a confident woman myself, I preferred this version of my spirit guide.  She was extraordinarily wise and patient. Not only that, but I could tell she had some control over other spiritual beings as well because they would come to her for instructions and followed her orders.  Forget princess, this woman was a queen!

Fast-forward several months, and I decided to Google Inonna.  Who is this person?  I was taking a long-shot into thinking I might figure out something about my spirit guide’s life. Well, Google came back with this suggestion: “Did you mean: Inanna?”

Inanna is the Sumerian goddess of love, sex, fertility, and warfare.  Holy shit, I get a legit goddess as a spirit guide?  I had heard of other mediums talking to ascended masters, but this was damn cool.  You may have also heard of Ishtar, these names are interchangeable.

Goddess Inanna: fucking up assholes since 4000 BCE 

And I realized pretty quickly how much I suck at clairaudience.

There are the 5 “clairs” we deal with in mediumship:

  1. Clairvoyance = clear sight
  2. Clairaudience = clear hearing
  3. Clairsentience = clear feeling
  4. Clairgustance = clear taste
  5. Clairallience = clear smell

Then there are the additional clairs that mediums also experience:

  1. Claircognisance = clear knowing
  2. Clairempathy = clear emotion
  3. Clairangency = the ability to touch objects and perceive spirit through their possessions (also called psychometry)

Anyone who is considering developing their mediumship should be aware that not everyone is strong with every clair.  My gifts are very biased towards clairvoyance and clairsentience, which is extremely common. I’ve had claircognisance show up from time to time, and I am very strong with psychometry.  In any case, it doesn’t matter what clair works great for you, accept your gift as being your own and don’t pass judgement onto yourself if the rest don’t come soon or at all.

In conclusion, meeting your spirit guide is probably one of the coolest things you’ll ever do.  Never mind the first name you hear, you may not have even heard it right.  The point is that one should realize that they are always watched over by someone in the spirit realm and they are like our guardian angels who we can call on in times of need or advice.  Let them help you and you will become a better person for it.  And try Google for confirmation and research: you never know who you’ll meet on the otherside!




OMG, I’m blogging! WTF

As a spiritual being who meditates a little less than I should, I just wanted to extend my whole-hearted welcome to you.

I am a happily married 30-something from Calgary, AB CANADA.  I grew up in in this city and I love my hometown very much.  My day job involves life in corporate Calgary and also have a business on the side that speaks more to my passion.  Like Teresa Caputo, I am a psychic medium.  I lack the hair, the nails, makeup and the tv show.  However, I can and do regularly talk to spirit.  They’ve got my back and they’ve got yours too, if you believe in that sort of woo-woo.  Doreen Virtue, angel cards, crystal balls and smudging sticks are displayed prominently on a shelf in my living room/dining room. My loving husband is very supportive of my spiritual endeavours among my earthly adventures.

I’m just going to put it out there that there will be a ton of woo and authenticity on this blog. I will speak to higher level subjects like angels, fairies, rainbows and unicorns (only one of which is real…unicorns, obvs!)  But I will also talk about my thoughts on love, relationships, loved ones in spirit, meditation, divine purpose, and so on.

If you like what you’re seeing so far, please follow this blog and let me know what you think.  Does my writing speak to you?  Can you relate to my eccentricities?  It’s too early for comments, isn’t it?